LOVE - LUST - MARRIAGE

    LOVE When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
    LUST When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
    MARRIAGE When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

    LOVE When intercourse is called "making love."
    LUST When intercourse is called "screwing."
    MARRIAGE When intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania.

    LOVE When you argue over how many children to have.
    LUST When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
    MARRIAGE When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.

    LOVE When you share everything you own.
    LUST When you steal everything they own.
    MARRIAGE When the bank owns everything.

    LOVE When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
    LUST When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
    MARRIAGE When ... uh ... what's a climax?

    LOVE When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
    LUST When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
    MARRIAGE When you phone each other to bitch about work.

    LOVE When you write poems about your partner.
    LUST When all you write is your phone number.
    MARRIAGE When all you write is checks.

    LOVE When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
    LUST When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all around.
    MARRIAGE When your only concern is what's on TV.